The deepest craving of human nature is the need to be appreciated (William James).  As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words but to live by them (John F. Kennedy).

I screwed up last week.  It’s still bothering me; I hope I don’t make this mistake again.  I was with a client at their manufacturing plant.  When I arrived for three days of leadership training I learned that they would be having a company Thanksgiving meal on Thursday and they asked if I would be able to stay and join them.  I was grateful that I was able to say “yes,” that I would be able to stay and join them in their Thanksgiving tradition.

On Thursday I envisioned finishing out the last session with the management team just before the Thanksgiving meal.  We would walk through the production floor and join all of the employees to share a meal together.  As I gathered up my things one of the managers asked if I wasn’t going to join them.  I said I was but thought we were heading to the break room to eat with the other employees.  I then learned that we would go to the break room to get our food but we would bring it back to the conference room and eat there.  That felt odd (or actually wrong to me) but I decided that they were the client and I was the guest at this point and I should follow their lead.

I regret having done that.  It seemed so contrary to the point of “giving thanks.”  I wish I would have asked if we could join the other employees and eat with the folks from the production floor.  It was an opportunity, as JFK said, to express gratitude and show appreciation.  Instead, we said a few hellos, gathered our food, and headed back to the conference room which is known as “behind the glass.”  In this case, the conference room is behind two walls of glass (to keep out the sound) but you can see out onto the production floor, and maybe more importantly, those out on the floor can see into the conference room.

It’s a short work week, but there is still time to express appreciation.

Appreciation is the deepest craving of human nature and the highest form of appreciation is not to utter words but to live by them.  Don’t follow my example, be grateful and express appreciation to those around you at work and at home through your actions.

Effective leaders recognize the power of gratitude.