You have not lived today until you have done something for someone who can never repay you.  ~John Bunyan

Last week I saw a 30-second news story that is worth sharing.  The man sitting in the chair in this photo is Mr. Steve.  He’s a janitor at an elementary school in Bourbonnais, Illinois.  These second graders are lined up to get Mr. Steve’s signature at the end of the school year because (quoting the school principal) he “always listens and always goes above and beyond.”

When I heard that description I immediately thought that Mr. Steve is a well-deserved example of generosity of spirit.  It doesn’t require a leadership “title” to have generosity of spirit, but it will make you a leader, regardless of your title.  Just look at all of Mr. Steve’s followers!

I did a little research to see what others had to say about a spirit of generosity and leadership.

When I say generosity I don’t necessarily mean monetary generosity, I mean generosity of kindness, compassion, friendship, understanding, and love.  The small contributions we can make to the lives of others simply by stepping outside of our own world a bit.  ~Heidi Oran

“Generosity of spirit” is one of the most important phrases you could use to describe virtue in another person or to name a worthy goal toward which to grow in one’s own life.  I just think it’s fundamental that, without generosity of spirit, we really don’t have much except a hard-scrabble life, a zero-sum game, and a “war of all against all,” each one trying to get his or her share or more of the pie.  Generosity of spirit simply says “I’ll give it away and I don’t need anything in return.”  ~Parker Palmer

Leaders quite often confuse being generous with giving people money—raises, bonuses, stock options, etc.  No one will refuse money if it’s offered, certainly, but research shows that more money isn’t much of a motivator for people.  The generous leader gives people what they truly want: knowledge, power, information, credit, praise, responsibility, and authority.  Perhaps most importantly, the generous leader gives faith; assumes that his or her people want to succeed and do good work.  The generous leader assumes positive intent.  When leaders share whatever resources they have, it evokes loyalty, support, and commitment.  ~Erika Andersen

A leader with a generous spirit delegates not just routine work, but understands about delegating worthwhile work that becomes a gift of development and growth for someone else.  How we love those leaders.  These are the leaders that make us want to get out of bed in the morning and go to work to give that person the very best that we have to offer.  These are the leaders who get our discretionary effort, every day.  ~Bruna Martinuzzi

Is there an unexpected leader in your organization?  Have you thanked them lately for their enduring generosity of spirit?

Quality of connections, not quantity, is what matters most.  And don’t worry about the “status” of a connection; all that matters is whether you can help each other reach your goals.  ~Jeff Haden

Networking—sometimes I dread that word because in our highly-connected world it can become all-consuming.  You can easily let networking take all of your time without a great deal of return on that investment.  I recently came across a blog post on Fast Company by Josh Mait and I liked his explanation of a “well-curated network.”  He suggests that there are three people who matter most in your network.

THE HUB

One of the most critical elements of a well-curated network, the Hub is the person with connections—lots of connections.  They are likely an industry veteran with an executive-level title, and they can introduce you to decision makers at a wide array of companies.  The Hub connects with purpose—specifically, to do you a favor.

THE MENTOR

Like the Hub, the Mentor is a seasoned veteran with considerable industry experience.  But their approach to connections is more measured, more surgical.  The Mentor can’t open as many doors, but that’s not why they are important.  The Mentor is a long-term connection who can help you raise capital, build a client base and recruit executives and board members.  Because they are more selective in their network approach, the Mentor is more difficult to connect with than the Hub.  Find someone in your network who has accomplished what you want to accomplish, and ask them if they know someone who can help you get to where they are.

THE RISING STAR

They are young, smart, driven—and really want to connect with you.  Smart networking isn’t just about connecting with those who can help you now.  It’s about helping others who might be able to return the favor well into the future.  The Rising Star will be referred to you through another connection, or they may just contact you out of the blue.

BONUS CONNECTION: THE OUTLIER

The Outlier is an experienced and well-connected professional who works in an industry that may be tangentially related to your own—or not related at all.  Connecting with the Outlier is best accomplished through shared interests or mutual friends.

These three archetypes, plus the Outlier, are the core of an effective network, and connecting with them—and nurturing that connection is easier than you think.  Focus on making quality connections that can provide you with actual value, both now and in the future.  In short, ditch the business-card bulk, and start being strategic.

We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly.  ~Aristotle

Ethics and morals: what are yours, really?  This is a question I was asking myself following a couple of trainings I did recently on business ethics.  One young man in the first training kept saying, “I think it’s morally wrong but I would do it anyway.”  I kept responding, “If you would do it anyway, then is it really part of your morals?”  In this case, the example was stealing drugs in order to save the life of a family member.  So while he thought that stealing drugs was morally wrong, he’d do it anyway in order to save the life of a family member.  For him, the life of a family member held a higher moral obligation than stealing.   Not everyone in the class agreed with this perspective.

Like the young man in my class, many of us find those moments when one of our morals or ethical obligations trumps another of our morals.  This is especially true, I think, if we’ve at least partially progressed through the stages of moral development.  Once we get beyond the legalistic stage we may bump up against more ethical dilemmas because answers are not as black and white as they may have been in previous stages.

The stages of moral development are very briefly described below and apply to both individuals and organizations.

Amoral: Leaders rule with power and authority, and they promote employees for obedience and for maintaining the status quo.  Profits and growth come before people and ethics.  The organization may break rules to boost profits.

Legalistic:  Managers are concerned with the legal rather than the moral ramifications of their decisions.  There are many rules and codes of conduct.

Responsive:  The organization shows some concern for its social duties and responsibilities.  Leaders react ethically to situations.  However, they usually simply follow what other organizations have done.

Emergent: Leaders are involved in ethics-related activities, they encourage ethics and social responsibility within the corporate culture, and they lead by example.

Ethical: Ethical values and behavior have permeated the corporate culture.  The organization respects employees and leaders for walking away from actions that violate the culture, or their values.  By its actions, the organization encourages competitors to follow its ethical lead.

Is your organization progressing through the stages, or are you stuck along the way?  If so, maybe check your own behavior and try to stretch your moral thinking to the next stage.  Take the ethical lead.

My responsibility, our responsibility as lucky Americans, is to try to give back to this country as much as it has given us, as we continue our American journey together.  ~Colin Powell

I’ve been spending a fair amount of time lately in rural Kentucky, facilitating training at a manufacturing plant.  This past week the training topic was ethics.  Part of the training included asking everyone to identify their own personal values.  I asked them to first select their top 10 from a long list.  Then I instructed them to circle their top five, and finally I asked them to cross off two leaving their top three.

One of the young men in these training sessions is an ex-marine.  I struggle to call him a retired marine given his age.  He’s a wonderful young man that I’ve been honored to get to know.  One of his top three values was “freedom.”  Hearing a marine state that one of his values is freedom was a powerful demonstration of how our most important moral principles guide our life choices.  I also discovered that his declaration of freedom had a depth of meaning far beyond my own sometimes trite statement of the same word.

Later that day, on the drive back to my hotel, I took a detour through the historic downtown area of this small town.  I came across a park that was absolutely filled with crosses and American flags, honoring those who had given their lives so that I could have freedom.

Now that I live in a very urban environment, I notice that we urbanites aren’t nearly as respectful of, or dare I say grateful for, the fallen heroes who have sacrificed their lives – the ultimate act of leadership.

It’s the day after Memorial Day, but that doesn’t mean we can’t (or shouldn’t) still pause and be grateful, really grateful, for those who have paid the price for our collective freedom.  It’s not hard to find leadership quotes from some of our military leaders.  Here is just a small sample.

My own definition of leadership is this: The capacity and the will to rally men and women to a common purpose and the character which inspires confidence.  ~George Patton

Leadership is a potent combination of strategy and character. But if you must be without one, be without strategy.  ~Norman Schwarzkopf

The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.  ~Thomas Jefferson

Live for something rather than die for nothing.  ~George Patton

A better world shall emerge based on faith and understanding.  ~Douglas MacArthur

Discipline is the soul of an army. It makes small numbers formidable; procures success to the weak, and esteem to all.  ~George Washington

Freedom.  Nelson Mandela said, “For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.”  May all leaders cherish their freedom and live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.

Leaders ask for and accept help along the way.  Good leaders know they can’t do it all themselves, and that even the strongest person needs support.  ~Erika Anderson

In today’s fast-paced and intense work environment, it seems to take a team of people to help us find, and stay, on a positive and productive path.  At different times and in various circumstances we may benefit from the assistance of a coach, a consultant, a counselor, or a mentor.

On a number of occasions I’ve been asked, “What is the difference?”  “How do you know which of the services you really need?”  I reviewed several of my resources and put some simple descriptions in writing so I could quickly respond to that question in the future.  Here’s my quick summary.

Coaching: is all about taking action, wanting things to change (wanting things to be different or better).  It’s about taking ownership and responsibility.  Coaching is future-oriented.  Coaching is about asking, “What would you like to change?”

3 Things a Coach Does

• Helps the client become self-ware
• Helps the client become self-decisive
• Helps the client take self-directed action

A coach works with a functional person to get them to become exceptional.  In coaching, the client is the content expert.  The coach collaborates with the client to create a solution using the client’s knowledge and answers.

Consulting: the consultant is the expert who assesses a problem or situation and provides a solution, or tells the client what to do.

Mentoring:  like a consultant, a mentor passes on the benefit of a set of specific experiences.  They bestow their knowledge and wisdom onto the student.  The student looks up to the mentor and seeks guidance and advice from the mentor.  Many times mentors are volunteers or a professional colleague.

Counseling: tends to focus on feelings and experiences related to past events. The problem from the past may be destructive, debilitating, or interfering.  Counselors typically work with people who need help to become emotionally healthy.

Author Anne Wilson Schaef said, “Asking for help does not mean that we are weak or incompetent.  It usually indicates an advanced level of honesty and intelligence.”

Are you a leader who should be asking for some help?