Did I offer PEACE today?  Did I bring a smile to someone’s face?  Did I say words of healing?  Did I let go of my anger and my resentment?  Did I forgive?  Did I love?  These are the real questions.  I must trust that the little bit of love that I sow now will bear many fruits, here in this world and the life to come.  ~Henri Nouwen

As 2014 comes to a close, it feels like a year that has lacked PEACE.  From as far as Syria to as close as Ferguson, PEACE has alluded us at many turns.  Regardless of what we may believe individually at this time of year, we can probably all agree that we yearn for PEACE.

Henri Nouwen challenges us to ask, “Did I offer PEACE today”?   He goes on to give us the means for PEACE.  Did we bring a smile to someone’s face?  Did we say words of healing?  Did we let go of our anger and resentment?  Did we forgive?  Did we love?

Imagine an organization whose leaders offer PEACE.  What if each leader intentionally focused on bringing a smile to an employee’s face, every day?  What if the leaders took the time to be empathetic with employees and share words of healing?  What if the leaders were capable of letting go of anger or resentment toward one another?

I’ve seen numerous leadership teams struggle to get in sync, to collectively fire on all cylinders.  Or maybe Henri Nouwen would say they weren’t offering one another PEACE.

History tells us that in the early 1900s the purpose of organizations was to create scale.  By mid-century the purpose transitioned to provide advanced services.  Today, in the 21^st century, the purpose of organizations is to become a place to create complete and meaningful experiences.  It’s hard for me to imagine a place that creates complete and meaningful experiences without PEACE.  It’s a new world, where people want PEACE and organizations need PEACE in order to thrive.

Mother Teresa’s wisdom may be words of insight for leaders of organizations in the 21^st century.  She said, “If we have no PEACE, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.”

During this week of holiday celebrations, as leaders, let’s offer others PEACE, because we belong to each other.

I am a human being, not a human doing.  Don’t equate your self-worth with how well you do things in life.  You aren’t what you do.  If you are what you do, then when you don’t…you aren’t.  ~Dr. Wayne Dyer

I recently spent several days in the hospital; and that was a stark reminder that I really am a human being and not a human doing.  For several days I couldn’t do anything; I could only be.

I was intrigued and probably a little entertained by the gentleman in the room next door at the hospital who spoke rather loudly.  He had recently retired (I’m thinking an early retirement) from being a stockbroker.  He said that as soon as he retired his cholesterol went down, his blood pressure went down, etc.  I don’t know why he was in the hospital other than his stay was more in terms of weeks not days.  I’m guessing that it may have had something to do with his years of doing that was now taking a toll.

This reminded me of a board member of a client who shared her story with me.  She was the CEO of a large, fast-paced organization.  Her work was her life.  Until one day when she found herself in the hospital with abdominal issues that could have been deadly.  That was her wake-up call to make a change.  She resigned from her position and took time off to just “be” for awhile.  I can still remember her telling me that she didn’t even know where her own vacuum cleaner was because she spent that little time at home; and yes, she had a husband a daughter.

Why do we focus so much on doing?  Maybe it’s because we’ve come to associate our own self-worth with how well we do things; and that may be especially true for leaders.  As Dr. Wayne Dyer said, “I am a human being, not a human doing.  Don’t equate your self-worth with how well you do things in life.  You aren’t what you do.  If you are what you do, then when you don’t…you aren’t.”

The Cooper Clinic has worked with executives since it opened in North Dallas nearly 40 years ago.  Founder Kenneth Cooper contends that there is just as much stress in a CEO’s job as there has always been.  What has changed is technology, which allows CEOs to have constant digital connection with their jobs and makes it difficult to unplug.  “I have patients that answer that thing all night,” he says.  “They need to turn off the phone and avoid taking work home.  We have CEOs who are in horrid shape because they have no work-life balance and are suffering because of it.”

What’s really fascinating is there are numerous studies that have concluded that more time at work [i.e., stress] doesn’t make us any more productive.  Quoting from a recent New York Times article, “Spending more hours at work often leads to less time for sleep and insufficient sleep takes a toll on performance.  In a study of nearly 400 employees, published last year, researchers found that sleeping too little—defined as less than six hours each night—was one of the best predictors of on-the-job-burn-out.  A recent Harvard study estimated that sleep deprivation costs American companies $63.2 billion a year in lost productivity.

So I ask again, why do we put so much value and self-worth on doing?  It’s the time of year to be contemplating New Year’s Resolutions.  Maybe we could all consider making a resolution to focus more on being and a little less on doing in 2015.

If we had to point to one quality within a leader that can almost guarantee the prospect of success, it is a belief in the power of self-awareness and adaptability.  We have found that among exceptional leaders, self-knowledge and change are a constant in their lives.  ~Bob Rosen

How does your behavior affect other people?  How do other people feel when they are around you?  Can you recognize the impact you have on others and adjust your own behavior to create more mutually beneficial relationships?  These are critical questions for effective leadership and I’m beginning to believe they may be at the very heart of effective leadership.

Bob Rosen, author of Grounded: How Leaders Stay Rooted in an Uncertain World, emphasizes the importance of not only self-knowledge but also change and adaptability.  It’s not enough to know what your strengths and weaknesses are to be effective.  Leaders also need to know how their behavior impacts others and then adapt their behavior to increase their leadership effectiveness.  This isn’t just Rosen’s opinion; there’s research to support this belief.  Following are a few excerpts from his book.

Findings like these point to the need for a leadership approach that is dynamic, holistic, and integrated.  They strongly suggest the importance of agility and adaptability and of paying more attention to relationships inside and outside the company.  They also underscore the need to understand your impact on others, consider the bigger picture when solving problems, and become comfortable with unpredictable change.

According to one of the largest executive recruiting firms, 80 percent of executives have blind spots about themselves, and 40 percent have strengths they are unaware of or not using.  Problem areas that could stall or hijack executives’ careers include being too narrow, failing to inspire or build talent, and not relating well to others.

According to research involving 41,000 managers, most people are unaware of how their behavior affects others.  This is especially the case for those people who operate at the “extremes” (people who make quick decisions or, conversely, resist change and diligently follow rules).

Cadbury CEO Todd Stitzer tells of the consequences:  “If you think you can make it up the hill and then realize that people are not following you, you’re going to be a pretty lonely guy when you’re near the top.  So you have to know how people are feeling, and you have to monitor what comes out of your mouth.  You’re always self-correcting.”

Many of us are probably familiar with one of Maya Angelou’s most well-known quotes: “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”  As effective leaders, we need to be aware of how our behavior impacts others and then we must adapt, as Todd Stitzer said, we must always be self-correcting.

[Leadership] is a balance of holding on and letting go.  ~rumi

Recently, I joined thousands of other Chicagoans and stood staring into the night sky over the Chicago River waiting for Nick Wallenda to walk a tightrope 60 stories in the air without a net or tether.  It doesn’t take an acrobatic expert to conclude that Wallenda had only one choice: to get it just right and walk the tightrope without wavering because he had an extremely limited margin of error.

As the world has now seen, Wallenda was successful and he achieved yet another daring feat and made the “Skyscraper Live” walk look easy.

For many leaders and managers, the balance between accountability and micromanagement may feel like a tightrope walk, trying to find the sweet spot with each step and hold people accountable without becoming a micromanager.

Accountability is all about holding an employee responsible for achieving the results they committed to. Micromanagement is dictating the activity of an employee as to how they will achieve the results.  Here are just a few possibilities to determine how you’re doing on the tightrope of accountability vs micromanagement.

Delegate the problem, don’t solve it.  The first sign of micromanaging is when delegating a problem or project you also dictate the specifics of the solution or “how” to solve the problem or complete the project.

Share experiences, don’t instruct.  As the work progresses, you may see a familiar situation arise.  If there are experiences to share then share the story; don’t turn the learning into “just do these steps.”

Listen to progress, don’t review it.  Micromanaging can also take the form of being specific about how progress should be reported or “summoning” people to review the progress.  If folks have been asked to take on a project, make sure they have the freedom to define the mechanics of the project as well.

Provide feedback, don’t course correct.  Things might not always go as well as everyone wanted and when that happens managers can sometimes slip into “gotta get this fixed” mode.  This not only dis-empowers, but de-motivates.  When things aren’t going well, the time is right for honest feedback and a two-way dialogue.

May we all be as talented as Nik Wallenda and walk the tightrope with confidence and ease.

Portions of this blog were borrowed from:  http://blog.learningbyshipping.com/2013/06/18/delegating-or-micromanaging-threading-the-needle/