How well do you love?

Leadership
The process of becoming a leader is, if not identical, certainly similar to the process of becoming a fully integrated human being.  ~Warren Bennis
I discovered Joel Manby in Matt Tenney’s recently published book Serve to Be Great.  Here is how Tenney describes Manby’s perspective on leadership.

Former CEO of Saab USA, Joel Manby points out in his book Love Works, many organizations are great at measuring what he calls do goals—the success of the customer experience, employee satisfaction, safety results, brand strengths, and financials.  But very few measure what Manby calls be goals—those we set for how we want our leaders to treat each other and the members of their teams while they are working to accomplish the “do” goals.  In essence, the “be” goals measure how well a leader lives the core values and fits in with the culture.  Manby believes that leaders should not only be measured on how well they achieve the “do” goals, but their performance on the “be” goals is also important.  In fact, their compensation should be directly tied to how well they do on both; in order to even qualify to be a senior leader a person must excel at both.

To get the best measure of the “be” goals we set for our leaders, we should consider gathering anonymous, 360-degree feedback from employees and peers, and getting feedback from seniors in person.  We can ask questions such as:

  • How well does Bob listen?
  • How willing is Bob to help others?
  • How important to Bob is the happiness and success of the people he leads?
  • How kind is Bob?
  • How compassionate is Bob?
  • How well does Bob live core value A (repeat for each value)?

In essence, we’re asking “How well does Bob love his team?”  Of course, we’re not talking about some romantic feeling that people often confuse with love.  We’re talking about acts of love—extending oneself for others’ benefit and treating them with kindness and compassion.  This is what it takes to be the ultimate leader. 

When we commit to measuring how well we love those around us, and how well the other leaders in our organization love those around them, we can dramatically improve the business outcomes for our organizations. 


The idea of having both “do” goals and “be” goals reminded me of Warren Bennis‘ definition of a leader—a fully integrated human being.  How can someone be “fully integrated” if they only have do goals and not be goals as well?  And, how can someone be “fully integrated” if they do not love well?

Leadership and loving well, a not often thought of combination, but far more interdependent than many of us may be willing to admit.